Miserable day with my leg today. I considered amputation, however, Valerie informs me that isn't going to end well, and quite frankly, I think she was telling me she isn't going to help me take care of personal needs while I am in my wheel chair. It's really hard to find a good friend these days.
My boss was a pretty good help today, though. He provided me with this back massager thing and told me I could use it to help loosen up my back. His only condition was that I didn't make any overly pleasurable faces. I'm pretty sure I've never reached nirvana with a back massager, but I guess there is a first time for everything. The closest I've come to an "O" face at work was when I found out the managers had to do their own expense reports.
My other boss showed me some exercises on how I might help my sciatic problem. I tried it and almost got stuck in the position. I think I'd better leave that to the professionals. Friday I have a physical therapy appointment, so hopefully they can help me out. My boss also asked this other guy if he could carry me around since I was in such pain. I looked at him and said, "oh, I think that is above the call of duty." The poor fellow. I know he wants to move up in the company, I should have called his bluff and seen just how bad. I should have said, "I'll spot you a $20 if you can get my fat ass off the ground."
The good news is, when I gimped out to my truck tonight, I found the answer to all my problems on my windshield. Julia the psychic left me her card. She already knew I was troubled, worried and confused. She also wants to check my shakra's. The card has a picture of the shakra's and the "root shakra" is right at the crotch area and it's a red circle. So, right away, I know this Julia chick is for real cuz she knows I'm a woman and that is where I have my period. She says she has 40 years of experience and she can connect me with lost loved ones and she can re-align my shakra's. I didn't even know I needed my shakra's re-aligned, so this gal, she already proved herself in my book. I just need to give her a call. She says she can help me with all my life problems. She is just who I have been waiting for. I'm totally going to call her. And, great news, she takes Visa or Mastercard. Julia says sometimes you just need someone to talk to. I know it's just a card under my windshield wiper, but I think this is the start of a beautiful relationship.
I'm totally going to call her right after I pass out from the muscle relaxers I just took. Who knows, I might be able to reconnect with loved ones on my own in this stupor. Well, I can't type anymore, so here's to getting in touch with my third eye shakra and seeing my way out of this mess.
My boss was a pretty good help today, though. He provided me with this back massager thing and told me I could use it to help loosen up my back. His only condition was that I didn't make any overly pleasurable faces. I'm pretty sure I've never reached nirvana with a back massager, but I guess there is a first time for everything. The closest I've come to an "O" face at work was when I found out the managers had to do their own expense reports.
My other boss showed me some exercises on how I might help my sciatic problem. I tried it and almost got stuck in the position. I think I'd better leave that to the professionals. Friday I have a physical therapy appointment, so hopefully they can help me out. My boss also asked this other guy if he could carry me around since I was in such pain. I looked at him and said, "oh, I think that is above the call of duty." The poor fellow. I know he wants to move up in the company, I should have called his bluff and seen just how bad. I should have said, "I'll spot you a $20 if you can get my fat ass off the ground."
The good news is, when I gimped out to my truck tonight, I found the answer to all my problems on my windshield. Julia the psychic left me her card. She already knew I was troubled, worried and confused. She also wants to check my shakra's. The card has a picture of the shakra's and the "root shakra" is right at the crotch area and it's a red circle. So, right away, I know this Julia chick is for real cuz she knows I'm a woman and that is where I have my period. She says she has 40 years of experience and she can connect me with lost loved ones and she can re-align my shakra's. I didn't even know I needed my shakra's re-aligned, so this gal, she already proved herself in my book. I just need to give her a call. She says she can help me with all my life problems. She is just who I have been waiting for. I'm totally going to call her. And, great news, she takes Visa or Mastercard. Julia says sometimes you just need someone to talk to. I know it's just a card under my windshield wiper, but I think this is the start of a beautiful relationship.
I'm totally going to call her right after I pass out from the muscle relaxers I just took. Who knows, I might be able to reconnect with loved ones on my own in this stupor. Well, I can't type anymore, so here's to getting in touch with my third eye shakra and seeing my way out of this mess.
Little Pony you will be fine! I know it feels like you won't now but spring is coming... and the PT will help greatly. I too have Sciatic really bad affects both legs. Somedays are better than others... Take care
ReplyDeleteBelieve me the whole amputation thing won't workout.
ReplyDeleteSigned Lefty