It's happened, I've become "them"

I was sitting at my desk today, trying to come out of my muscle relaxer fog, kind of feeling sorry for myself and I started to think back on how I felt when I started at the glass palace 14 years ago.  I remembered being approx 60 pounds lighter and I remembered watching the geriatric invalids walking into the building everyday.  I remember thinking, oh my word, I hope this place doesn't do this to everyone.  There was one lady that hobbled in with oxygen.  She wore a mask at her desk between calls.  There was another lady that wore one of those masks you get at the doctor when you are sick and they don't want you spreading the crud you have around.  If you even wore lotion or perfume, she went ballistic on your ass.  There was another lady that  had this walker/chair combo thing and she  could only walk so many steps at a time and she had to stop and rest.  All of these ladies were large ladies.  It would seem CCA, Call Center Ass, was running rampant in this building.  I should have ran when I had the chance.

We had several folks that required ambulance assistance on a regular basis due to various health ailments.  In my younger days at the palace, I would always say to myself, shoot me if that ever happens to me.  And here I am, the fat girl, hobbling around because of a pinched sciatic nerve.  I guess there has been discussion from my pal Valerie about going to the grocery store and stealing one of those scooter shopping cart things.

I tried to put these things out of my mind as I opened an email advising me that we are going to do ANOTHER hiring open house.  I let out an audible whimper. We just finished an open house, I don't want to do another one.  I started thinking it might be nice if my desk was better equipped to handle these types of emergencies.  What I need is some sort of oxygen mask to drop from the ceiling like it does in an airplane when everything goes to shit and you are going to crash.  I looked up.  I think it wouldn't be too hard to install.  I asked Valerie to come over and I told her to hug me and I told her everything would be okay.  She seemed scared.  She asked what was the matter.  I assured her it would be ok, but that she needed to read the email.  She read it.  Her face fell, she too, whimpered.  We were in this together.

While I will have to see if my request gets approved for the breathing apparatus at my desk, there was something I was able to do to ensure some sort of comfort in these tough times.  It was vendor day at work and I was able to score a cool stuffed pony that came with a blanket and a sticker book.  One of our visiting managers was scoping out my new pony.  I told him that I was going to pet it and rock with it when times were tough.  I think he thought I was joking.  I'm not.  And, I am super excited about those stickers.  I don't exactly know what I will do with them, but I'll think of something.