So, I went to my surgery appointment today. Made my weight goal, since the doctor's scale is lighter than mine. Thank you, God.
I don't really know what just happened the last few hours, but I am totally stoned on drugs. I'm effing awesome and I want some people to come over so we can sit around in a circle like that 70's show and talk about what's awesome. Will said while I was knocked out I went on a magical unicorn ride and you know what? I believe him. It was effing awesome! I like unicorns.
When I was starting to come out of my anesthesia, I saw my doctor at the foot of the bed and I asked him, "Do I still have my spleen?" He said yes. I said, "Are my intestines intact too?" He said yes. Whew, that is a relief after him almost cutting off his finger on the wood working tools. However, what I don't understand is how I got a fat bottom lip with two marks. Is my doctor a Twilight fan? Did he bite me? Did I get out of hand and they whacked me? I don't know, but it is FAT. No one is talking. The nurses aren't talking. I need to know. I also asked if they had given me a boob job, but they said no. Damn. So hard to get good service. They did give me pictures of my guts though, that is also awesome.
I walked up and down the alley in my gown with the nurse. She said she would catch me if I fell and promised my butt wasn't sticking out. I don't belive that she would catch me, but I went walking anyway with my little rolly drug bag thing and the nurse on the other side. I did three laps without passing out, so I guess I was good to go home. Will was at the other end of the hall yelling, "it's just like Nascar, she just made another left turn!" I asked the nurses to drug him up, but they declined.
One the way home, I called my brother to see if he wanted to come be "stoned" with me. He declined. Everyone else I called on the way home seemed to enjoy the fact that I am on good meds and don't even care that my incisions hurt.
I'm home now and will probaby go pass out. Being high is a lot of work. I just wanted everyone to know I lived and to not divy up my desk toys yet.
I'm going to crash now. Thanks for the support!
I don't really know what just happened the last few hours, but I am totally stoned on drugs. I'm effing awesome and I want some people to come over so we can sit around in a circle like that 70's show and talk about what's awesome. Will said while I was knocked out I went on a magical unicorn ride and you know what? I believe him. It was effing awesome! I like unicorns.
When I was starting to come out of my anesthesia, I saw my doctor at the foot of the bed and I asked him, "Do I still have my spleen?" He said yes. I said, "Are my intestines intact too?" He said yes. Whew, that is a relief after him almost cutting off his finger on the wood working tools. However, what I don't understand is how I got a fat bottom lip with two marks. Is my doctor a Twilight fan? Did he bite me? Did I get out of hand and they whacked me? I don't know, but it is FAT. No one is talking. The nurses aren't talking. I need to know. I also asked if they had given me a boob job, but they said no. Damn. So hard to get good service. They did give me pictures of my guts though, that is also awesome.
I walked up and down the alley in my gown with the nurse. She said she would catch me if I fell and promised my butt wasn't sticking out. I don't belive that she would catch me, but I went walking anyway with my little rolly drug bag thing and the nurse on the other side. I did three laps without passing out, so I guess I was good to go home. Will was at the other end of the hall yelling, "it's just like Nascar, she just made another left turn!" I asked the nurses to drug him up, but they declined.
One the way home, I called my brother to see if he wanted to come be "stoned" with me. He declined. Everyone else I called on the way home seemed to enjoy the fact that I am on good meds and don't even care that my incisions hurt.
I'm home now and will probaby go pass out. Being high is a lot of work. I just wanted everyone to know I lived and to not divy up my desk toys yet.
I'm going to crash now. Thanks for the support!
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