My New Friend Wednesday...

Some of you may recall that I have been mourning the loss of my Boot Bitch family over the last several months.  Some of the girls have moved on to other jobs outside of the company and some to other jobs within the company. The long and short of it is, I don't get to see my bitches. With all of my bitches leaving me, it's been lonely.  Sassy Pants recommended that I should really befriend one of her friends that I had seen around.  So, I did what anyone in my situation would do, I walked up to my "new friend" and said, "So, we are going to be friends now."  My "new friend" seemed scared, but willing.  We have since been chit chatting and getting to know each other.  Today we reached the point in our evolving friendship where she has been bequeathed a blog name.  The time had come.

It all stared out simply enough.  She came up to my desk to ask me how I was doing.  She then shared that she had a tough night the night before with a bitchy customer, so when she went home, she had to drink wine.  Well, first she had to go to Whole Foods and see if she could find some vegan mac n cheese.  And, there was a coupon for it, so that seemed like the thing to do.  I stopped her right there.  She just went into a realm I could not understand for a variety of reasons.  Let me break it down for you.

1. She had a hard day and she decided to treat herself, maybe even be a little "destructive" with comfort food.  Her comfort food was VEGAN MAC n CHEESE.  That's comfort food?  Really?  You're going to show you're body you love it and you are sorry the day sucked and you went to Whole Foods and bought vegan mac n cheese.  Whoa, easy girl.
2. She went to Whole Foods.  She didn't go to the liqueur store, or Baskin Robbins, she went to Whole freaking Foods.
3. She had a coupon.  I mean, if you are going to live a little, buy something bad for you and pay full price, because why?  Because you don't give a shit and bitches be crazy!

I sat there and blinked at her.  She was unaffected. She felt she had done the logical thing. Look, Spock, if I need comfort, I am going to fuck some things up, eat some bad ass food and not care what I spend.  This rational, logical, non harmful approach is something I can't even get my mind around.  I questioned our ability to relate as friends.  I thought maybe it was a good idea to clear the air on some other topics, so I started the inquisition.

•  I bet you don't even step on cracks in the sidewalk, do you? She never did answer this question. Curious, but I bet she doesn't, she just doesn't want to admit it.  She wants to be badass on some level.
• Do you use the F word? Do you say Fuck?  NO.  She tries to keep her communication clean...but sometimes she thinks it.  She doesn't say Fuck?  Mind. Blown.
• Do you speed in your vehicle?  She did once, but got pulled over, so she never has since.  I can't even talk to this girl.
• What is your stance on pre-marital sex? She is okay with it because it is possible for it to be enjoyable.  It's possible?  Or it is?  I didn't delve into that.
• Do you recycle?  She tries to.  Does she compost?  Most of the time.  Sweet Maryanne, I don't know what to do with all this information.
• What do you do if the Jehovah Witnesses come to your door? Are you nice to them?  She says she reacts completely unemotional and tells them she doesn't believe in God.  That's when it hit me, why didn't I see it before? She is like the character Wednesday from The Adams Family.  Her blog name is henceforth - Wednesday. 

Our conversation continued.  Out of the blue, she did admit to cat-calling at a Mormon boy, as if that showed her commitment to a life of shenanigans.  There may be hope for this relationship, after all.

And then, things got really deep.  I told her that she had just inspired me to blog, which I hadn't done in a while and that I was giving her a blog name.  I told her it was Wednesday.  She seemed to like it.  We then talked about what day of the week I would be, if my name was a day of the week.  I said I would probably be a Thursday.  You know, not Wednesday, I couldn't see myself as that, and I couldn't be a Friday full of fun and optimism.  And Tuesday, who's a Tuesday?  Not me, not Wednesday.  But maybe I could be a Monday, full of angst, stress and low energy.  I mean, Thursday, that is like, almost there, almost to Friday, but still hanging on.  So yeah, I could be a Monday or a Thursday, but not the other days.  Don't get me started on Saturday or Sunday, I'm not going to be a weekend day.  That's just too wild.  Anyway, I think we resolved some important stuff today.

I still am unsure of Sassy Pants recommendation, I mean, Wednesday doesn't say the F word.  I don't even know what to do with that.  Her go to comfort food doesn't have an animal in it.  Animals are tasty.  I don't know if we can go the distance, but if she cat-called a Mormon boy, well, that's something.

She may well end up being as colorful as my Boot Bitches, but it is going to take a while to see all the colors.  This one...this one isn't a sharer like the others.  Again, I don't know what to do with that.  I'm a sharer.

That is all I have to share today, really, but I just had to share with my readership that I have encountered something I do not understand and it will likely come up again.  This theory of responsible, calm reactions to things in life that suck.  I feel like I just discovered a new planet in the universe. More studies must be done.  Ooooo, I could have named her Lab Rat  or Big Bang Theory....but, she really is a Wednesday.  I can't go back on my blog name intuition.

Welcome to the blog, Wednesday.