I apparently woke up with "Angry Cat" face this morning. I mean, I think I do EVERY morning, probably, but no one is here to see it. Will had a little bit later shift, so he came in the bathroom as I was just getting out of the shower. He's like, "why the angry face?" I said, "What do you expect my face to look like? It looks like this every morning." He agreed, gave me a quick kiss and left.
The angry face apparently followed me to work. I had to stop in at Safeway to pick up some gift cards and some candy for the dish at my desk since some people were complaining about the lack of candy. Whatever. I get up there to buy the gift card I needed and the guy informs me I have to pay cash. I'm like, "What do you mean I have to pay cash, this is a corporate expense with my corporate card?" He said he was sorry, but that was the policy. I was pissed. I buy cards at this very store ALL. THE. TIME. No one hassles me, they just sell me the damn cards. "Sorry, Miss, that is our policy, and has been for the last year." I responded, "Well, the rest of the employees here clearly do not care about the policy as they ALWAYS sell me the cards, and I come in here often." He wasn't budging. I could tell, I could bust his balls all damn day and this guy was not gonna give it up. He was a rule follower. His underwear are pressed and folded in his drawer. He knows what he is going to wear the night before and his food is alphabetized in the pantry. He isn't going to let me upset the status of national freaking security by allowing me to purchase a Visa pre-paid gift card for $390. He is the gate keeper. He is looking into the eyes of a crazed angry face and he is unafraid. If the zombies come, I want this guy on the front line. I told him I would take my business elsewhere. I showed him. Mother trucker.
I arrive at work early and the craziness begins. Another group of people were moved into our new area over the night. I was doing inventory and checking on the troops. There were a myriad of problems, but I, as the move coordinator, jumped in and handled them. It's my job, it's what I do. Later, as I am walking over to find the boss of the newly moved troops, Sassafras Hassenfphefer, I walk up and he says, "We were just talking about you..." I said, "oh yeah, why?" He said, "everyone was saying how you were over here this morning taking care of all the broken stuff and caring for their needs and seemed chipper and I said, Wow, she must have sucked someone's soul out to be that happy." I said, "hey now!" Hmpf. See, this is why I shouldn't be friendly, ever. People get freaked out, they don't know what to make of it and then suddenly, I must have sucked out someone's soul. Whatever. I've said it before, and I'll say it again, being a bitch consistently is the way to keep the force undisturbed.
Anyway, the rest of the day was busy with testing candidates and caring for whatever needed caring for. I left at a reasonable hour for the first time in a while. I headed home, took care of the ponies and decided to kick back and check out some stuff on Facebook. I see that most everyone is supporting gay marriage, that's nice, saw a few quotes about how you have to overcome fear and hurdles to realize your dreams...blah, blah, blah, every day is a blessing, someone had a baby, someone found 25 lipsticks in her purse, someone posted a mostly naked guy, someone posted a yummy recipe, you know, the usual stuff. Then I see this thing about how while everyone was worried about gay marriage that Obama passed a law called the Monsanto Protection Act, which basically has some fine print from the government saying how they aren't responsible for all this genetically processed shit that is going on food and that how if we all die, it isn't their fault. I asked Will, what is this stuff in? He said, "everything." He then gave me a long dissertation on the whole deal. So, basically, if I understand correctly, we are screwed. Everything we eat may or may not kill us. The zombies may or may not kill us. The ozone layer may or may not kill us. Everything we do and eat causes cancer, which may or may not kill us. Weapons are everywhere, the owners of said weapons may or may not kill us. The government is so completely corrupt, we are all doomed. Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, all lies. And pajama jeans, are they jeans or are they pajamas? I can't live like this. It's all too much. I don't know how to live or what to do or what to believe anymore.
Is this getting too dramatic? I mean, I can go on and on, but I really do need to get some sleep. I'm sure this will foster up some great dreams. I'm going to need the power of the unicorn light to guide me into slumber.
Okay, let's call it a day. Goodnight. Sweet dreams, fellow minions of doom.
The angry face apparently followed me to work. I had to stop in at Safeway to pick up some gift cards and some candy for the dish at my desk since some people were complaining about the lack of candy. Whatever. I get up there to buy the gift card I needed and the guy informs me I have to pay cash. I'm like, "What do you mean I have to pay cash, this is a corporate expense with my corporate card?" He said he was sorry, but that was the policy. I was pissed. I buy cards at this very store ALL. THE. TIME. No one hassles me, they just sell me the damn cards. "Sorry, Miss, that is our policy, and has been for the last year." I responded, "Well, the rest of the employees here clearly do not care about the policy as they ALWAYS sell me the cards, and I come in here often." He wasn't budging. I could tell, I could bust his balls all damn day and this guy was not gonna give it up. He was a rule follower. His underwear are pressed and folded in his drawer. He knows what he is going to wear the night before and his food is alphabetized in the pantry. He isn't going to let me upset the status of national freaking security by allowing me to purchase a Visa pre-paid gift card for $390. He is the gate keeper. He is looking into the eyes of a crazed angry face and he is unafraid. If the zombies come, I want this guy on the front line. I told him I would take my business elsewhere. I showed him. Mother trucker.
I arrive at work early and the craziness begins. Another group of people were moved into our new area over the night. I was doing inventory and checking on the troops. There were a myriad of problems, but I, as the move coordinator, jumped in and handled them. It's my job, it's what I do. Later, as I am walking over to find the boss of the newly moved troops, Sassafras Hassenfphefer, I walk up and he says, "We were just talking about you..." I said, "oh yeah, why?" He said, "everyone was saying how you were over here this morning taking care of all the broken stuff and caring for their needs and seemed chipper and I said, Wow, she must have sucked someone's soul out to be that happy." I said, "hey now!" Hmpf. See, this is why I shouldn't be friendly, ever. People get freaked out, they don't know what to make of it and then suddenly, I must have sucked out someone's soul. Whatever. I've said it before, and I'll say it again, being a bitch consistently is the way to keep the force undisturbed.
Anyway, the rest of the day was busy with testing candidates and caring for whatever needed caring for. I left at a reasonable hour for the first time in a while. I headed home, took care of the ponies and decided to kick back and check out some stuff on Facebook. I see that most everyone is supporting gay marriage, that's nice, saw a few quotes about how you have to overcome fear and hurdles to realize your dreams...blah, blah, blah, every day is a blessing, someone had a baby, someone found 25 lipsticks in her purse, someone posted a mostly naked guy, someone posted a yummy recipe, you know, the usual stuff. Then I see this thing about how while everyone was worried about gay marriage that Obama passed a law called the Monsanto Protection Act, which basically has some fine print from the government saying how they aren't responsible for all this genetically processed shit that is going on food and that how if we all die, it isn't their fault. I asked Will, what is this stuff in? He said, "everything." He then gave me a long dissertation on the whole deal. So, basically, if I understand correctly, we are screwed. Everything we eat may or may not kill us. The zombies may or may not kill us. The ozone layer may or may not kill us. Everything we do and eat causes cancer, which may or may not kill us. Weapons are everywhere, the owners of said weapons may or may not kill us. The government is so completely corrupt, we are all doomed. Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, all lies. And pajama jeans, are they jeans or are they pajamas? I can't live like this. It's all too much. I don't know how to live or what to do or what to believe anymore.
Is this getting too dramatic? I mean, I can go on and on, but I really do need to get some sleep. I'm sure this will foster up some great dreams. I'm going to need the power of the unicorn light to guide me into slumber.
Okay, let's call it a day. Goodnight. Sweet dreams, fellow minions of doom.
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